Our responsibilities weigh on our heart sometimes. One responsibility weighs on me particularly.
Over the years, I have been obsessed with the idea of “due diligence.” Usually this concept relates to law or business, but I have applied it to religion. I have been obsessed at times with digging deeply into the myriad human constructions that claim to represent the Transcendent, the Divine, or what have you. Most of the time, that which is, in Nietzsche’s words, “human, all too human,” has overwhelmed that which appears to be from beyond the material reality that we experience day to day. But after years of this work, there are things which, to the best of my limited abilities, appear to ring with a Truth that comes from beyond the stars.
It goes without saying that, as a Muslim, I believe that the Qur’an is one of those things. It also goes without saying that the person of the Prophet Muhammad (may the peace and blessings of God be upon him), taken as a totality, is another. But the questions that Muslims are asking these days always carry the subtext, “But what else?”
There is so much I do not know, and so much I am not, but I am beginning to feel selfish for not sharing more, especially when I am reminded that I would be lost if so many others had not shared of themselves for my benefit (may God reward them all with the best of rewards).
The other night, a feeling I have had for years was confirmed in my heart again. This is something I have experienced, and which a number of good, smart people have also confirmed for themselves. I offer it to you, the reader, in hopes that you benefit from it, and please forgive me if it does not.
That feeling which I would like to share is that one of the greatest lectures by a Muslim scholar in the English language is “The Seventeen Benefits of Tribulation” by Shaykh Hamza Yusuf. [it can be found on youtube as well] I recommend it to anyone who is serious about their spiritual life, and who is looking for support and answers in their journey. I have listened to many lectures over the years, and I can honestly say that this is one of the most blessed that is currently available.
The difficulty of this is that everyone is unique, and everyone is in a different place. I found this lecture when I needed it most, and it has been my companion over the years, always there for me when I need it. May Allah (Glorified is He) reward Shaykh Hamza and the staff of Alhambra Productions for this work, may He continue to benefit us through them, and may He give each of us that which we need to continue walking the path.
I once sat in front of a great shaykh, whom thousands of people rely on to get right with God, and he said, “If you are relying on anyone other than Allah to make it, you will be disappointed.” May God guide us to the best means that He has created for us to reach Him, and forgive our mistakes and weaknesses. Amen.
A Mercy Case 
Ameen brotha. Your posts continue to hit it right on the head. When there is longing, what is that longing compared to longing for Allah? When there is pain, what is that pain except a blessing–as the best men have been tried by hardship in degrees.
Man, my favorite part in that lecture is the vivid memory we all share of being tossed up in the air as a child–that description of momentarily being completely vulnerable and unsure. But what a brief moment it is before we are back down to security and inshaAllah closer to Him.