After all the studies of fiqh manuals and pilgrimages overseas.
After all the tazkiya al-nafs and reading of commentaries on ‘aqida texts.
After all the discussions about schools of thought and attempts to understand 1400 years of Islamic history.
After all the work building out masjids and schools and third spaces.
I am writing this from the same kitchen table where I sat eating ham as a 17 year old kid who just wanted to skateboard with my friends and go out with my girlfriend.
What was it all for?
The only compelling answer is that I have changed on the inside.
The body that sat here at age 17 wasn’t sure if God was real and was definitely not convinced of the resurrection.
But the 40+ year old man knows that whatever I am is nothing but what God has blessed me to utilize for a short time, and that just as I once came from nothing into this world, so too can God give me life again in whatever place God chooses.
My heart sends salawat and salam upon the Best of Creation and his purified progeny, the leaders of humanity, through whom I understand who God is and how best to serve God in my little way.
I understand my religion in both its historical development and its contemporary relevance, and live it each day and am willing to teach it to others.
My fingers hope to please God by writing this message, as a reminder that if I can find Islam, then any 17-year old American kid who is thinking about nothing but the dunya right now can also find the answers to the meaning of life within the Islamic tradition.
I have no idea how many years I have left on this Earth, but I am thankful for the life I have lived and the future laid out in front of me.
Human beings plan and Allah plans and Allah is the best of planners.
MashaaAllah, I can honestly say that I feel your words are coming straight from the heart.
There are several people in my life that I’d love to see God bless them with the light of His knowledge and guide them to the path of Islam but, as you mentioned, you and I can plan but the Almighty is the best planner and only He can guide those He chooses. But I always like to at least do my part and hope that with a few words or book recommendations that it could, with God’s will, plant a seed of faith.
I pray that Allah forgive our sins and our short comings in this life and continue to guide us to Him and follow the practices of our beloved prophet Mohammad (PBUH) and the prophets and messengers before him.
ameen!